The Strip - GP Archive: Pocket Kings

[Harry Krishna]

Trouble Times, part 2

**BEEP**
“Commander to Captain IceStorm.”

“Yes Commander?” Said IceStorm over the Intercom.

“Space look pretty calm as we speak, sir, should we head out to trade?” asked Commander.

“Yes, Commander, set a course to the nearest Port in the area.”

“Aye, Aye Captain.”

[IceStorm reports to the bridge as soon as USS Bite Me docked at a port]

“Captain, we are being hailed,” said Ensign.

“On Screen” said IceStorm

**Hail went on Monitor**

Port 5643: “Welcome, how can I help you today USS Bite Me?”

[IceStorm glares at the Commander] “How can you know the name of my ship, port 5643?

Port 5643: “It is written all over your ship.”

“All over?” said IceStorm.

Port 5643: “Yep.”

“May I see your view screen Port 5643?” asked IceStorm.

[Port 5643 sends the view screen of USS Bite Me]

“Oh MY GOD!!” said IceStorm as he sees his normally spotless ship with the word USS Bite Me all over. “I’m going to kill that dealer who gave me this ship!” said IceStorm.

“Want us to help?” said the crew.

“Sure. As soon as we get back to the Federal Government HQ” said IceStorm.

“But Captain, wouldn’t we get caught when trying to kill the dealer sir?” asked a Crewmember.

“Yes that is true, however I wasn't really planning on killing the dealer. I have something else in mind,” said IceStorm, winking.

“And that is...?” asked a crewmember.

“Well, I --”

Port 5643: “You are holding up the line here, what did you want to bargain today?”

“What is selling in store today, Port 5643?” asked IceStorm.

Port 5643: “Wood, Food, Computer, Cows Disease, --”

“Cows Disease? What is that?” asked IceStorm.

Port 5643: “A new illegal good that has just been released.”

“How much to take 60 cargo units of Cows Disease?” asked IceStorm?

Port 5643: “1054 credits.”

“That's a bit much. I'll buy them for 834 Credits” said IceStorm.

Port 5643: “Deal, transferring Cows Disease now.”

[Port 5643 transferred 60 units of Cows Disease to USS Bite Me, USS Bite Me transfers 834 Credits to Port 5643]

Port 5643: “Thank you, have a good space day.”

**Port 5643 goes off the Monitor**

[IceStorm notices a odd looking face before monitor went off]

“Hmmm… I wonder what that was about” thought IceStorm.



Reincarnation Survives Combo-Alliance Attack

UPI - Monte Carlo
A coordinated attack on the Reincarnation stronghold in Monte Carlo was carried out recently by three of the top 10 alliances. The Crusaders and E.P.I.C. alliances even joined forces for a time and were reported to have formed a temporary joint alliance called The Epic Crusade at one point in the attack.

It started with a mine-clearing effort by member of the Legitimate Businessmen. Witnesses in the Rosenkreuz galaxy sighted several LB pilots clearing a path through to the UNO and up to the entrance warp of their home in Monte Carlo.

Hours later, a fleet of 13 Crusaders ships made their way into Monte Carlo and attacked a level 9 port. The port was reputed to be one of the big money-makers for Reincarnation, and when its defenses were destroyed, the Crusaders came away with a jackpot of 350 million in cash.

At that point, five E.P.I.C. pilots were waiting to join in the action. The two groups formed a temporary alliance called the Epic Crusade and moved to converge over a nearby planet deep inside Reincarnation territory. A mishap occurred however in which the Crusaders leader Piratedan was killed by members of E.P.I.C. Despite the feelings of outrage that this incident caused, the temp alliance moved forward and took several shots at the planet. All was going according to plan, or nearly so, when the planet's defenses were breached and a huge fleet of 16 Reincarnation ships, mixed traders and warbirds, rose up from the surface of the planet.

The Epic Crusade fleet fell back and prepared to make straifing runs into the Reincarnation defenders. Twice this was done, and after losing three ships to the defenders single loss, the attackers paused...and paused....and paused. Finally the Reincarnation fleet of 15, which sat waiting over their shattered planet for the bitter end, watched in disbelief as the Epic Crusader fleet disbanded and left the Monte Carlo galaxy.

The fortunate Reincarnation pilots were overheard laughing about the attack in a nearby tavern and some were even celebrating and claiming victory in the affair. Most military analysts, however, believe that the survival of both fleets make claims of victory on either side incorrect. Cyrus Morinvak, a veteran of many psychic wars, remarked, "It was a partially successful operation for Crusaders and E.P.I.C. Going into Reincarnation's territory, looting a port and breaking through their planet's defenses was clearly a success. Taking the fleet down would have been the coup de grace, but in that regard, they failed."

It is uncertain why the Crusaders and E.P.I.C. pulled out before completing their OP. Rumors that a serious disagreement among the leaders led to the dissolution of their pact have been heard. Some say it was related to the killing of Piratedan by E.P.I.C. That seems unlikely to be the only reason because his ship was destroyed before the planet bust started and the combined group was able to continue. Others say the E.P.I.C. faction needed money to replace lost ships in the middle of the OP. Perhaps the Crusaders refused to loan E.P.I.C. the cash and that is where the breakdown occurred. This too, seems not to answer completely because the Crusaders could have continued the attack with just their ships. Questions remain, but the fact is that an opportunity to destroy 15 Reincarnation ships was lost that day.



PR Party Hot Spot

The Flamingo galaxy has been the site of a number of port raiding parties. The Reincarnation alliance sent a small raiding party there and took a shot or two at the port located in sector 2010 recently. The two Crusaders pilots patrolling the area in their ITACs were able to drive off the partiers, who left their beer and wine bottles littered all over that sector. Some of these bottles were half-full however and the Crusaders added the leftover liquor to their own party reserves.

The next night, members of the Nintendo Strikes Back alliance made their way into the popular party spot. NSB took one shot at the port, but their eight ships were destroyed shortly thereafter by a small strike force of defending Crusaders ships. Two Crusaders ships were destroyed in the encounter. No leftover bottles were found this time. "They didn't have much time to get the party started it seems," said Kal, a Crusaders member who led the defense.

The next day the Crusaders themselves held a port raid party in the same sector and busted the port open. Locals are wondering why would the Crusaders do such a thing. Crusaders leader Piratedan responded, "Well it looked like so much fun when everyone else was doing it, we thought we'd try it too. Plus we had all this leftover booze to get rid of."



One Player's Opinion: What has happened to us?

I remember a time long ago when a hunter would pod an innocent trader to become bigger and badder. But these hunters back in the day were compassionate, empathetic people who would gladly give the podded person enough money to buy another ship.

In today's age, apparently, there is a new order to things. Now it's: pod as many people as you can before it happens to you. And try to have huge stashes of money no one knows about, that not even your alliance knows about.

My sad, sad people. It is now time to go back to that wonderful era. My friends, let's get back to the Old Skool days.



Crusaders Escape Pods Crowd Fed Space

Transmissions are pouring into us here at the Galactic Post complaining about the overwhelming number of Crusaders escape pods cluttering up Federal HQ's. "It took me 2 hours to escort my ship through Nijarin Fed Space," says local high ranked Nijarin trader Corona, "This is out of hand."

The high number of Crusader escape pods is the effect of a recent attack on the Flamingo Galaxy, home of Crusaders. "It took us by surprise at first, but once we saw them coming, there was not a whole that we could do but sit and hope to overpower them with the number of people had parked on our rock", said one unidentified Crusaders member.

A total of 24 Crusaders died in sector #2019 to the guns of Reincarnation ships. Reincarnation then moved to 2002 to collect Crusaders bond money, rumoured to be over 100 million in Federal Credits. Crusaders have suffered a heavy loss, but they have always proven their ability to get up and hit back in the past. Will they be able to do it again?

And what about Reincarnation? The question on all of our minds at this time is, will Reincarnation do it again, and who will be next on their list?
-- GPW #4



Rock Concert Destroys Solar System

In a huge show of intergalactic peace, the kids of the universe all flocked to Alpha Ceti One. The show was featuring bands like '100 years after 10 years After', 'Country Joe and the Giant Fish Thingy', and of course 'The Who', who were still playing their farewell tunes.

Using some new Newtron* speaker technology, Crewin Vega was able to produce 100 bazillion giga watts of sound. Once the entire crowd disappeared it quickly became an issue. The problems then became compounded when it became obvious that the 2 full moons that orbit Alpha Ceti One also vanished with the crowd. "I think we have a problem here" said a frightened technician."We redefined blowing them away."

As we have all now heard the news, this destabilization of the standard gravitational pull in Alpha Ceti One caused the inner 5 planets to drop straight out of orbit and all the gas giants on the outside ring to "wobble". The 2 moons being blasted out of the solar system caused irreparable damage to the solar system as a whole.

"This is probably the biggest disaster in known history," said Fudwrecker, a respected member of the Creonti council. "It's like the mother of all Alice Cooper concerts." And he may be correct: a total of 6.5 billion people lost their homes or lives, and 4 of 6 planets' climates have become inhospitable.

The concert promoter is claiming no liability for beings on any world. Fudwrecker is asking for donations to help support the people who have lost their homes and livelihood.