The Strip - GP Archive: One-Eyed Jacks

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Harry Krishna
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The Strip - GP Archive: One-Eyed Jacks

Post by Harry Krishna »

Trouble Times, Part 5

[Meanwhile… on USS Shoot Me]
“Ok time to learn how to use this Fury ship,” said IceStorm.

“Yes Captain, but kind of hard to learn without the manual isn’t it?” asked the Commander.

“Manual? What manual? Who cares about that piece of crap anyway? Driver, ahead full speed,” said IceStorm.

[The Driver pushes the wrong button, and the ship rolls upside down]

“Ok maybe the manual is a good idea after all, but how we going to reach the control now?” asked IceStorm from the ceiling of the ship.

“Well we could rock the ship, sir. We might be able to flip it over again,” said a crewmember.

“I don’t think our weight would effect the roll over here,” said IceStorm, but it can’t hurt to try.”

** The Captain and the Crewmembers try to rock the ship. After several tries, it begins to roll and continues to do 360 degree rolls**

“Now you've really done it, commander!” shouted IceStorm. "We wouldn’t be doing so many rolls over again if it wasn’t you’re your Idea” said IceStorm

“Why thank you, I do what I can. I could have sworn the button that said "Push Here In Case of Roll Over" would help us,” said the Commander.

“oo shhaatuuupp” said IceStorm

**Few hours later, after studying the ship and practicing, the ship comes under control**

“Captain I believe we are getting the hang of the ship, sir,” said a crewmember.

“Yes I believe so Plot to Port 5643, I got a score to settle there,” said IceStorm.

“Aye aye sir” said the Ensign.

**Few hours later, meeting back at Port 5643**

“Captain we are at Port 5643 now” said the Ensign.

“Good open hail to the port,” said IceStorm.

“Hail open sir” said the Ensign

“This is Captain IceStorm of the USS Shoot Me, we have returned to settle the score.”

Port 5643 responded with, “USS Shoot ME?? HAHAHA, man I didn’t think anyone was dumb enough to fly that ship. Now I have met one.”

“Fire at will!” said IceStorm

“Aye aye sir” said a crewmember.

**The Battle Begins…….**

“Umm.. Captain, I think you should take a look at this,” said a crewmember.

“What's that on the screen?” asked IceStorm.

“I believe those are our shields” said a crewmember.

“Wha-??!! Who jettisoned our shields!?” asked IceStorm.

“No one did, I think the ship system did that” said a crewmember.

“RETREAT!” said IceStorm

“We can’t seem to sir. I keep hitting the retreat button and it's not working,” said the Ensign.

“AND why NOT!?” asked IceStorm.

“Well this retreat button seem to make the Drone Scrambler go and the fire button makes the ship jettison the shields. You know I think that's how the ship got its name, sir” said the Ensign.

“NOW you tell me this while we in battle!!?” asked IceStorm.

“Well these buttons were working before we went to Red Alert,” said the Ensign.

“Ooo I see, well find the button to get us out of HERE!!” said IceStorm.

“aye aye, sir” said the Ensign.

**USS ShootMe finally retreated when the Ensign hit the self destruct button. **

“Man what a day, time to head back home now” said IceStorm.

“Yea I agree.. we ran into enough trouble for one week” said the commander and the crewmembers agreed as well.


The End



TheKid is Released!

Well, the day is finally here...TheKid has been released from jail!
Citing his record of good behavior, a judge ordered that TheKid be released earlier than expected. Some citizens see this as an outrage, others are welcoming this old time player back.

One thing is for sure, TK's pretty happy to be back. The writers here at the Galactic Post got an after-release interview with the infamous trouble maker, and this is what he said. "Yes, it feels great to be back. I'm glad a lot of people are welcoming me back, and forgiving me for my past mistakes. I've learned a lot being locked up for over a year, and hopefully everyone in the galaxy will learn that I have changed."

His words sound good, but only time will tell if this old-time, trouble-making teenager will be able to change his ways.



Rising Alliances

Two alliances are speeding up the ranks of the universal heirarchy. The Rebellion is currently 10th, and is determined to continue growing. Alpha Factor is right behind them, and closing fast. Alpha Factor is focusing on being a major commercial influence, but it is capable of holding its own against all but the strongest alliances. Alpha Factor has several strong leaders, aside from the alliance leader. Cheiftan looks after the weaker traders, Lib Kahor guides any who need advice. And Kaos leads the way with experience. Which of these will reach the top 5 first? Only time will tell.
by Adnon


Inactive and Reincarnation Unite Against Crusaders!

In a surprise move the alliances Inactive, lead by SuspectZero, and Reincarnation joined forces for a cooperative bust against a Crusaders homeworld. SuspectZero is a former member of Reincarnation who left a few weeks ago to focus on Christmas shopping. He was seen leading the Reincarnation bust against Crusaders tuesday night, a member of Reincarnated was booted to make room.

The joint bust is quite the turn around in policy for Reincarnation, who in the past few weeks have flamboyantly flaunted a "holier than thou" attitude towards alliances participating in joint operations and non-agression pacts. An anonymous Reincarnation member was asked the reason for the flip flop, and responded, "We had no choice, when SuspectZero left us we were lost, we had no sense of direction, literally, we were practically flying into each other."

Early reports on the joint operation, however, did not look good as the joined forces of Inactive and Reincarnated lost 10 warships to the defending planet. However, once the planetary defenses were defeated the Crusader fleet had no chance against the combined might of Inactive and Reincarnated as they went on to route Crusaders 15 to 0, with several more Crusaders dying in attempts to flee the battle.

Crusaders have yet to be able to regain control of their home galaxy. However their hopes were lifted when SuspectZero once again left Reincarnation to continue focusing on his Christmas shopping, leaving an unfillable void within Reincarnation. Other alliances in the Strip universe, however, can not rest easy in knowing that a pact between SuspectZero and Reincarnation still exists and at any time they could once combine their might against an enemy.

The question remains, can any alliance stand up against the combined will of whatever alliance SuspectZero creates and his helper alliance Reincarnation? Only time will tell...



Deceit and Treachery at Alpha Factor

Last week in Alpha factor suffered a devastating loss to their efforts. Upon inception into the alliance several members decided to violate the trust that we all give when we offer friendship and protection in an alliance. Two members of the alliance Alpha factor plotted a scheme to steal millions of dollars from those that trusted them. One night last week Jizzy a new member to the alliance gave the pass codes to the Trader Fayt. Fayt then proceeded to steal an estimated 18 million dollars from the Alliance bank account and then split as quietly as he came. Jizzy and Fayt then formed their own alliance with, at the time the unknowing, Adnon.

This alliance is the Galactic Trade Union. Adnon headed up this alliance and when he found out of the treachery the seethes through this new union he resigned his position and is now with his former alliance of Alpha factor. The new leader Alex has stepped up and has vowed open war with Alpha Factor. He says that Alpha factor has threatened him and his friends and he will not stand for it.

As for the two culprits behind it Jizzy has told this reporter that he plans on fixing the wrongs that he has committed. I can only say that time will tell on that one. As for Fayt, the man that did the dastardly deed, there is no remorse for this criminal’s actions. When questioned about what he did the fiend said with beaming pride, “Adnon is dumb and I'm glad he left I will not give AF their money back and that is final. I'm glad about what I did and I think others are too.”

This reporter’s opinion is that that heavy fines and imprisonment should be the least for Fayt. As for Jizzy, if he pays back the money some sort of community service should be in order. Hopefully our society has not degraded to the point in which we as traders will allow such actions to become commonplace.



Gunfight at the WQ Corral

Last week, violence rocked Federal space in the normally quiet West Quandrant Human galaxy. Last minute Christmas shoppers ran for cover, and owners of parked ships in the sectors battened down hatches to protect their vessels from damage as members of Crusaders, Reincarnation, and E.P.I.C. battled in and around the federally protected zones.

It began as a dozen ships from the Crusaders alliance were sighted hovering over the level 9 port located in sector 1552. Witnesses say the Crusaders ships, led by the notorious criminal Harry Krishna, opened fire on the port and began blasting through it's hefty defenses. Port security did it's best to defend, and the Crusaders ships took heavy damage from multiple laser turrets and hundreds of combat drones. But the port raiders were determined, repeatedly resupplied their ships, and continued their attacks.

As the port raid was underway, small fleets of ships from Reincarnation and E.P.I.C. appeared in the area and, according to one unidentified woman, "were looking for trouble." This became obvious as E.P.I.C pilots straifed Crusaders ships as they resupplied shields and armor at the WQ Hardware shop. The Crusaders pilots retreated and rejoined their fleet in 1552.

Meanwhile, the Reincarnation ships, led by The General Lee, assembled in a nearby sector hoping to pick off a few damaged port raiders. Three of the Reincarnation pilots found themselves riding a pod however, when the Crusaders fleet surrounded them and reduced their ships to rubble. At least two other Reincarnation ships, including The General Lee himself, remained in the area.

The Crusaders fleet then moved to the steps of the WQ Headquarters to engage the E.P.I.C. ships. E.P.I.C.'s fleet proved to be elusive, however, so the Crusaders returned to the port to finish the raid. A skirmish broke out then between Reincarnation and E.P.I.C. in which one E.P.I.C. ship was destroyed. Two Crusaders pilots were later podded by E.P.I.C. as they UNO'd at HQ and shortly after that The General Lee fell to Crusaders guns in a brief firefight.

The busted port finally gave up it's cash to the Crusaders raiders, the stolen cash reported to be 130 million. On the way to the bank, the Crusaders fleet encountered and destroyed three E.P.I.C. ships. The Crusaders then went on to bust 3 more ports that night, taking in an additional 330 million in cash.

WQ officials have declined to comment on how such lawlessness is allowed to occur in supposedly protected areas of space. A total of four Reincarnation ships, four E.P.I.C. ships, and two Crusaders ships were destroyed, dozens of ships parked in federal space were damaged by the fallout, and close to 500 million in cash was stolen from ports. An official inquiry into the matter has been announced by the WQ council, but most citizens are skeptical that anything substantial will be done.



Fudwrecker Wins Civilian Citation!

A Giant Lobster was attacking the outposts of the Creonti galaxy in what could have been a disaster of cosmic proportions. The Lobster was preying on all the Creonti minor planets and all the Creonti Devestators were elsewhere.

The Creonti High Council went to Fudwrecker and asked him what to do. "Our borders are under attack by a big crustacean, Fud, What should we do?"

"Well that's a no brainer," said the Fud. "Double-couple and over ride your anti-matter power output modules and have an engineer heat up a lake of about 300 billion cubic meters of H2O. Then reroute all your home world molecular modules and focus your transporter beam at the creature, and beam it into the lake. Make sure the planet you pick has corn on it. Because it will be one tasty feast."

Fudwrecker's plan worked and the Creonti people feasted for 10 whole days on the lobster. To show their gratitude the Creonti Council awarded Fud with the Creonti Civil Service award. This is Fudwrecker's first Civilian medal.



Rein in Shock?

If you read the news recently you saw that the Crusaders have rebounded quite nicely. After a period of regrouping and a port-to-port money drive, Crusaders just may be back in business. And judging from recent activity in Flamingo, it looks like Crusaders have taken one level 70.00 planet back from Reincarnation.

As for the morale in Crusaders that has been questioned, this reporter suggests reading the news and seeing the activity that the Crusaders are still showing. They are still fighting for what they believe in. At last check, ban points are at a minimum and all are still able and willing to die for the cause and get back to building their galaxy and building up mine fields to defend it.

In conclusion, there will be no controversy as to who is still fighting the fight. Crusaders have shown in this latest round of conflict that all they need is their members to take down a Rein planet. Rein claims it takes 60 to do the job of 30, but eyewitness reports say that 16 Crusader pilots showed Rein where Sterling can put his terms of surrender.

Crusaders have shown in the past they will fight till the end of game. They are bound and determined that this round will be no different. How much more can Crusaders take? There is no alliance in the game that can make them quit or surrender.
that which pods you makes you stronger
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